Gordon Brown
No. 5: Giles Coren
Thursday, July 31st, 2008GC and GB: two douchebags with a massively over-inflated sense of their own merits who are prone to tantrums and bullying of subordinates. And then those self-same subordinates enjoy a modicum of revenge by leaking evidence of that utter douchebaggery to the press.
Coren, though, is a moderately talented writer who can narrow down to four [...]
No. 4: Dead Men Walking
Monday, July 21st, 2008Rather like Hamid Karzai and Nouri al-Maliki.
They may be in charge of two of the world’s most unstable and dangerous places on earth; and they may be high on the “most likely to be assassinated” list. But they don’t give off the voter-scaring bad vibes that aspiring commander in chief Barack Obama detects in Brown. [...]
No. 2: Haemorrhoids
Saturday, July 19th, 2008PHARMACIST: Good morning, sir.
YOU: Ah, pharmacist. I don’t quite know how to say this, but…
PHARMACIST: You feel like someone’s jammed a splintered plank up your ringpiece?
YOU: Good heavens, how on earth did you know?
PHARMACIST: You’re wearing a dustman’s uniform. It’s clear to me that you are just another low-earning individual who has been viciously shafted [...]
No. 1: The Deep Fried Mars Bar
Saturday, July 19th, 2008A quintessentially Scottish product that attracts derision and revulsion in equal measure. And yet, unlike the Prime Minister, the deep-fried Mars bar is also regarded with affection. Both have the power to arrest vital organs, but whilst the chocolate-and-batter treat has the same volcanic heart that beats in every devil-may-care [...]